Sunday, December 5, 2010

A Double Apology

Friends, Family, and Guests:

I'm writing this first post with the intention of making two apologies. One is an apology in the classical sense of the term. As some of you may have heard, I have decided to enter into full communion with the Roman Catholic Church. Despite substantial continuity, the faith that I now affirm is in some crucial aspects different from the faith which I was taught as a child, which I have embraced and which I have shared with others. It moves my religious identity away from the vast majority of my beloved family and friends. Such a significant move demands a sincere, reasoned, and thorough explanation and this blog is meant to provide the bare beginnings of that. I don't intend to primarily provide arguments as much as explanations, “reasons for the hope within me”. I understand my current faith as a completion of the lived out faith which has been modeled and passed to me. I was taught to seek Jesus above all else, and following Jesus is what has led me to the Catholic Church.

I'll try to occasionally post up reflections on my journey here so that you can begin to get a fuller picture of what's been happening. Also, you can read a wordy yet incomplete story of my understanding of the narrative God's been crafting so far. Please feel free to contact me with any concerns, respectful questions, or just to let me know how you feel. Cell phone number and email address are the same as always.

The second apology is an apology in the more colloquial sense of the word. I've spent months fearing the sadness that my entry into the Catholic Church might cause to others close to me. Fear itself is never right, because God's love casts out fear, and the sin of fear has beget even more sin within me. I haven't been open with all of you about where my thoughts, meditations, prayers, and research has been leading me. In part, I wanted to take my time in making my decision and feared the pressure that having everyone know would bring. (For those of you who know me well, I hope you can understand my strong preference for prolonged information gathering before making a decision). Perhaps more pertinent, though, is the fact that I was afraid of losing people's love, friendship, and respect, and thus selfishly delayed publicizing my intentions for nearly as long as possible. I may well have unintentionally brought more frustration to many of you by not sharing my journey with you until now. I sincerely apologize to all of you for whom this is the case, and now believe I should invite you all into the journey and sincerely hope you'll pray for me as I keep seeking the face of my Savior.

God bless,

Nate

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